I show up here after months just to complain how the world is not adopting the same flavour of eccentric as I do. Well, that, and the utter bloody rudeness of society these days.
I am not a violent sort of person. I never raise my voice, I don't hit or even kick things. Oh no, I am all about the internal seething, which always results in the do you grind your teeth question at the dentist's. (No, I do not. I gnash them.)
Teeth gnashing is triggered by many things. Littering is one of them. I do not understand litter. I do not understand what goes through a person's mind when they open the car window and assume everything outside that little environment is a big rubbish bin. In my world, a cigarette butt flying out of a car would be prosecuted just like speeding - with demerit points, and increased insurance, and all the rest that goes along with it.
Here is another. I have never - ever - been to a woman's home and found the toilet seat sprinkled in urine. And yet, I would say at least half of public bathrooms have this feature. I understand that there are women whose posteriors are so posh that they could not conceive placing them on a toilet seat that may have touched someone else's bum. So they hover over said seat. Now, these are likely the same women who would throw sixteen hissy fits at their boyfriends if they did not lift the seat to do the exact same thing albeit facing a different direction at home, no? Are your *hands* also so precious that you cannot lift the seat if you must hover? Are you too delicate to clean up after yourself? Because it is *much* easier and more pleasant for someone who *didn't* make your mess to clean it up? I do not get.
I do not get the young ladies and men who stroll, slowly, three abreast on sidewalks - and do not significantly move over when a pedestrian comes the opposite direction. Never mind being aware that the slow slow slow stroll is blocking people who are walking at a normal pace behind them.
I do not understand why texting while walking is so popular. Or adults riding bicycles on sidewalks - when there is a *bike lane* on the road. Or - and this one is way up on the teeth gnashing scale, far beyond the texting and strolling and all that - the jerks who, when traffic is very heavy, pop out in to the merge lane, drive all the way to the end of the merge lane, and then push back into the lane they just exited. I was stuck on Highway 8 during an accident on my way to the airport some weeks ago. We were not moving very quickly - after all, it was a busy time, and we were down to a single lane over a bridge. And we moved even more slowly because of the constant stream of the merge lane maneuver folks. I was grateful for the driver of the big rig who, after a good 20 minutes of this, himself switched to the merge lane (well, first I thought, you ass, so you'll get 2 km further before being stalled again) but he put himself into that merge lane, and stayed right beside me for the entire 2 km. I grinned up at him, he grinned back, and I happily let him back in when the time came (and it did make a difference in average speed, when there is only one lane and you have a steady stream of one lane pushing into two already crawling lanes... well, you'd be happy with 10 km/hr...)
Oh, and this is really in the cranky spinster category - it may even veer into cranky spinster librarian with glasses on a string, and make sure they're glasses where the arms attach at the bottom of the lenses and then swoop up - what is with "thankful"? Why does no-one use "grateful"? It is a much better word - just like there is gratitude, which is so much more elegant than thankfulness. I have long lost the argument about the distinction between "affect" and "impact" (for the record: to me, if one thing impacts another, there is a physical impact. If I were to give my teeth gnashing more physical expression, my foot might impact your butt, for instance.) Neither one of these arguments can be won, since common usage has moved on. Doesn't mean I don't get my knickers into a - metaphorical - knot over it. I also mourn the demise of the adverb.
Oh, and can we talk about the word "site"? As opposed to "sight"? As in, she was a vision in white, it was quite a sight? If it's a site, then I am assuming you are talking about the wedding chapel or something - a site is a physical place, if you are referencing seeing something, let's go with sight. Idioms have etymological roots. I don't care that spellchecker seems to think it's ok. Spellcheck, after all, flags itself (no, really, sepllchecker and spellcheck are both underlined in red on my screen right now!)
More bloody rudeness. My local Superstore has gotten rid of all the plastic shopping baskets. No substitute. So it's monster cart or nothing (they don't even have the half carts, or smaller carts). I prefer the plastic basket for many reasons - not only because I don't have to buy that many things at the store, and always taking a basket prevents me from chucking unnecessary things into the cart, but because the aisles are *always* blocked with some person who parks their cart in the middle and then lounges about surveying the soup display. You cannot get past, though you can squeeze by quite easily with a basket. But no more! And you know why? Because people were *stealing* the plastic baskets! Taking them home! Because a plastic bag costs you five cents! (which, also - WTF is the fuss here? I am so very pleased at the effect this minor levy has had. Time it was, I would be the only person hauling my cotton bags to the store, and I got plenty of eye rolls from the bagging boys - and I didn't WANT their help, I prefer to pack my own bags, and I am faster at it as it is, and oh the rudeness of the people who just stand there - probably texting - and watch the cashier do the work after she rings in their purchases. But this tiny fee has resulted in most people bringing their own bags. Except for the dinks who steal the baskets. I have switched grocery stores in response. No, really, I have. Sobeys has baskets, albeit with those security tags that squeal if you take them out of the store - because that is *stealing*)
Then there are the people who mark up library books. The people who park in mamababy and handicapped spots when they should not (just because you have an empty car seat in the car or your spouse - who is not with you - has such a permit in the car...) The middle lane drivers, when traffic is clearly moving a whole lot faster and people keep passing on the right - that's your sign! Move over! The unabated cell chatting when it is now a traffic violation - I cannot wait until the police issue actual tickets for this!
And Remembrance Day poppies. Sigh. I understand the sentiment. I don't understand why they can't be designed so as not to leave *pins* littered all over the place. After so long of no flat bike tires, two in the last week. I'll be walking home today, carrying my back wheel. Because I have nothing better to do.
Ah. Better.
You wouldn't know that I'm so very happy these days. Well, happy is a funny word. I am very aware that I am satisfied with how I am living my life. Things are going well. I am tired of sharing elements of my private life on the internet. It is what it is.
Posted by Johanna at November 24, 2009 10:24 AM